Embracing Failure as a Perfectionist & Artist

I talked on the phone this evening to a good friend of mine who I’ve been working with for the past 4 years. We have completely opposite personalities, but I often feel like we operate at the same intellectual level, so it’s always fun talking about our deep thoughts and emotions especially in the corporate world and creative space. She, like me, is on the path of ever-changing priorities and deciding whether she wants to stay in corporate America or not. 

Like me, she is also trying to learn how to let go and accept that sometimes we fail at things, and that it’s okay. However, relinquishing that control has been a challenge. I think I’ve gotten better at letting some things go as I exited my late 20s, but as I listened to her, it got me thinking how hard it is to offer any help or advice when I feel myself pretty much in the same position. Maybe it’s a millennial thing. Maybe it’s also a byproduct of being in your 30s. I couldn’t tell you though. 

One thing I am sure of is that when I started this small biz of mine back in 2024, I told myself that I would start letting myself embrace failure more in terms of art and everything that encompasses running a business. Being so afraid of failing is what made me hesitate in selling my art for the past decade. It’s one of my biggest regrets. It’s almost been a year since I started on this solopreneur path, and I will admit: this is HARD.  

When you tie a chunk of your identity to achievements, praise, and your work, how do you manage when things aren’t going the way you envisioned in your head? I swear this blog post isn’t meant to be negative at all, but as someone that entered her 30s this year, embracing failure in a healthy way is something that’s been on my mind a lot.

Some context: I grew up as a “gifted” straight-A student with a college reading level in elementary. I was doing college level math by the time I was in middle school. (Now that I’m older, being so “ahead” is probably not the healthiest thing to be exposed to as an impressionable child). I’ve always been a rule follower. I’ve never skipped school or went to detention, or got my parents called for something bad I did. I was the first college graduate in my family, and somehow managed to get myself a good job in the field I actually like. I’m now in management, on my way to an art director position in the next few years, and I’m running my own small business. 

And yes, these are all truly good things and a testament to my work ethic and grit. But I’ve gotten so used to doing everything “right” (and “fast”) that I still struggle with how to manage how I should be feeling when I inevitably (as any human would) and occasionally do something WRONG. It’s a little embarrassing to admit that failing, disappointing others, and straying off the “expected” path still feels like the end of the world to me. The neurodivergence doesn’t help make this easier, either.

But, since this post is part word vomit, part useful information, here are 10 real ways I’ve been working through my “failures” in starting my own tiny art shop:

1. I get to determine what success means to me. 
2. Social media metrics do NOT measure how “successful” my art is.
3. No video post is a “flop”. Virality is temporary, and building communities is more meaningful and important, especially in terms of actual marketing strategy. First and foremost, community builds trust.
4. It’s okay to not be immediately good at drawing certain things. I have the privilege to learn something new! 
5. The paths other artists take in their art journeys do not affect my own. They simply exist.
6. Social media is not the only channel to share my art! 
7. As a part-time artist, I simply do not have the same hours of the day a full-timer does to commit to my business, and THAT’S OKAY. 
8. I am fundamentally a slow artist, and that's also okay. 
9. Redirection is NOT failure.
10. ART IS SUBJECTIVE!!

Following this list, I’d also like to add an honorable mention of: “It’s not that deep.” 

I tend to use this phrase more often these days to recalibrate my brain when I start spiraling. You fail, you try again. That’s it! It truly isn’t a big deal. Why do we make things so hard on ourselves?! Funnily enough, it actually does help a lot. I have instead started asking myself these questions as I’m creating:

1. Am I having fun?
2. Did I try my best?

Think about the core values of why you started whatever it is you started. I created CHUNCHUN STUDIO primarily as a way for creative freedom, getting to know myself, and to find my people. Just do the thing that makes you happy! You don’t have to become rich and famous off of it to feel like it was worthwhile.